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Busy-bee.

I know I've been so silent for so long. Been busy for a lot of crapity-crap! So, good bye for now. And I promise I'll be back. :*

This is sad.

i feel like going mad every second of everyday, like someone is coming after me. ---forgive me for saying this, but it think you're the only person who i can tell everything but afraid not to.


You know,...there are days when I don't love life when I want to do exactly what you said here, screw the world and just hide in my shell or something like that esp when I'm unhappy, when I feel like I've disappointed others, disappointed myself...

Just the other day, I was so mad that I threw the things I was holding and I cried but then I slept and after that, I forgot the negative feelings and was glad that I didn't do anything worse or else I would have regretted it.

Life is too short and too important to waste it you know? I read on the newspaper the other day that someone who was hailed Bb. Pilipinas I think, or sth, died in a car crash and I thought to myself okay, so she wasn't ready to die but here I am sometimes thinking that I want to disappear. Now that's just unfair for her, and for the plenty of people who never had the chance to live their lives the way they wanted to...

Life isn't always about being happy. How can you appreciate happiness when you're always feeling that, eh? Don't worry....that is just temporary. Do find things that make your life worth living and live your life for those who weren't given the chance to. :)

What do you do?

It’s funny when you think everything’s good, but suddenly life decides to hit you with a sharp right hook.

What do you do? You suck that shit up, deal with it and try to punch back. Life’s always a struggle, right? Oh yeah, life’s really funny that way. Wouldn't you agree?

Trust, I’ve got issues with you.

We constantly put our trust in people without even thinking and more often than we’d like, we suffer the consequences. I’m not even talking about just personal relationships; I’m talking about interactions with all people, strangers even. It’s like one of our biggest flaws is that we expect too much of other people. And that’s pretty fucked up thinking, right? To believe that it’s a flaw that we have such high expectations in people or that we think others will act with the same morals as we do. I mean, that shouldn’t be a bad thing. No wonder it’s so difficult to consciously trust anyone nowadays, because if and when you do so unconsciously, it sometimes doesn’t end well. It’s like believing in common decency; you involuntarily set yourself up for failure. So if you had a choice in the matter, why would you do so voluntarily?

On a day-to-day basis, you expect the best in people without a second thought. You hope that someone won’t hit your car and just leave the scene because you wouldn’t do it to another person, and yet look what happens, hit and runs occur all the time. You think someone won’t steal from you because you would never think of doing it to another person, and yet it’s not uncommon that you see someone pocketing 50 pesos off the floor. You assume someone will hold the door open for you as you’re struggling carrying your things, and yet there’s the door in front of you closed shut.

If we can’t even trust that people will do the these sorts of thing on a daily basis because it’s the decent thing to do, how are we to trust people with things so much more precious like your friendship or your heart?

Riddle me this.

Kinda sucks cause it seems like you end up hating whoever was just trying to improve you or whatever.

"I'm just saying, you need to learn how to accept criticism whether or not it's meant to help you. Believe it or not, unless it's [pure] hating(aka. I haven't even seen your work and I think it sucks because I hate you), it's actually useful."

I looked at that last submission about the 'geek thing' and inaamin ko, I really reacted badly....hahaha. Sorry about that and I owe that person an apology.

Ganito na lang...I'm not used to being criticized unless I ask for it from people who really are good with their craft so I'd know they're reliable. For example the other day I showed my doodle to some of my friend so she deals with deliberating w/ art works all the time and she critiqued my work and I was actually somewhat proud of my work but there were a lot of things wrong with it, according to her, so of course I felt bad but I just kept that to myself and digested all the 'formalist criticism' she gave me. And the other month I talked to this really brilliant photographer and I felt so baba next to her but syempre, I kept that inside.

Yun nga, like what I said with the other submission yesterday on my formspring which I deleted, it's in how they say it. It's the internet so I really don't know if their intention is to help me or hate on me/ make me feel bad kasi 'di ko sila nakakausap ng face to face unlike these people I mentioned before. And I'm sure you see naman how much hate mail I get so really, I hope rin you understand my part why sometimes I react 'unprofessionally' and like a bitch, for some. Sometimes, I just don't want to tolerate rude people and sometimes I can't distunguish 'rude' from 'plain frank' so yeah.

I hope you get me naman and I made sense...hehe. But I will keep in mind, what you said, and every time I receive 'crticism' I'll try to take them all as 'constructive.'

:)

Don’t make people options.

We all know that stage of “talking” where you’re getting to know someone and it may or may not lead to being in an exclusive relationship. Well, I for one and I’m sure I’m not the only one, think that the exclusivity should start at that stage, not just when you finally decide to be in a relationship with that person. What do I mean exactly? I mean you shouldn’t “talk” to more than one person at a time. It’s common sense, guys. And I really do mean guys, as in male, because it seems like you are a lot guiltier of acting this way than females. Not to say that girls haven’t been guilty of it either.

Call this preaching, but I’ll just call it a piece of friendly advice. Don’t “talk” to more than one person at a time. Point blank.

Now you’re probably thinking at this point that what I’m saying is bullshit and that you’re not doing anything wrong, but you know damn well your behavior is the bullshit in this situation. You’re seriously doing a disservice to yourself as well as to these girls. They are not stupid and they will find out. Trust, they will find out, you will get caught, and someone will get hurt. As a matter of fact, more often than not both girls will get hurt. You think that you’re doing nothing wrong by being involved with these girls at the same time? Well, you’re wrong. You’re disrespecting them both. If you had any ounce of care or respect for either of them, you wouldn’t be treating them that way. You wouldn’t treat them as an option. Honestly, if that’s the way that you look at the situation, then you really don’t deserve to be in a relationship let alone are you even mature to be in one. I do not say this in haste. You see, the moment that you look at another person as merely an option, something you can easily just toss if you like the other better, then you’ve just proven that you’re not ready for a relationship. You’re not ready because you don’t even see that this kind of mentality is fucked up.

I’d like to see how you would feel if you were to find out that you’re just another item on a menu. You’re not good enough to be someone’s one and only choice. Nope, you’re not important enough to be a priority because you’re just another option. I’ll tell you right now, from experience, that it sucks and it hurts. If you’re willing to hurt someone like that without so much as a second thought, then you definitely don’t deserve to be in a relationship with them and they definitely don’t deserve to be in one with you either. They deserve far better than you.

And to the ones who’ve been victims, remember this:

You deserve much better.